Perfect is the enemy of good: how perfectionism works against us
Don’t let perfectionism stop you
Do you struggle with perfectionism? If so, it could be making you sick. According to Psychology Today, perfectionism can lead to many negative outcomes, including procrastination and toxic self-talk. It can also result in depression, anxiety, eating disorders and self-harm. Even mild cases of perfectionism can negatively impact your quality of life and affect your work, education and personal relationships.
What is perfectionism?
People with perfectionism hold themselves and sometimes others to impossibly high standards. They think what they are doing is never good enough, and they want to produce outcomes that are 100% perfect every time. Perfectionism can affect children and adults. It can interfere with many activities, including school work, sports, community service and jobs. Eventually, many people with perfectionism end up not completing tasks they are more than capable of completing or missing deadlines and failing important tests.
What causes perfectionism?
Perfectionism comes from having excessively high standards and being overly self-critical. Its causes are not always clear; however, it is a learned behaviour that often comes from feelings of inadequacy. Many forms of perfectionism are driven by low self-esteem. This may be a result of adverse childhood experiences and feelings of unworthiness.
How perfectionism works against us
While striving to do our best can be healthy and positive, it is possible to take things too far. Perfectionism can lead to negative outcomes such as procrastination, making toxic comparisons between yourself and others, and failing to get things done. Many people with perfectionism tell themselves they are not good enough and will not be good enough until they are perfect. As perfection is impossible to achieve, perfectionists ultimately set themselves up for failure.
How can you let go of perfectionism?
Letting go of perfectionism involves changing your mindset. This involves letting go of impossible ideals and using compassionate self-talk to remind yourself that many things are worthwhile even if they are not perfect. Overcoming perfectionism often involves:
acknowledging that you are allowed to make mistakes
dividing overwhelming projects into small steps
focusing on one task at a time
recognising that most mistakes create learning opportunities
setting realistic goals.
What’s next?
If you suspect perfectionism is interfering with your well-being, speak to a doctor or mental health professional. They may recommend therapy or other strategies to help manage your symptoms.